. . A girl, and 18 years old. I just want to write down how I feel because then maybe I will be able to make sense of everything. If you want to please leave comments and/or advice. I feel so alone, like if nobody cared. I hate that my mom chooses my brother over me for absolutely everything. I feel like I have no real friends. I hate that school now makes up 90% of my life. I hate that I have no really good memories in High school like others I know. Today I got up and started the day off just fine, and then about mid day everything seemed to collapse on me. I spent the rest of the day locked in my room just crying and trying not to cry anymore. I should have been writing and Research Report for my English class but I couldn’t concentrate on anything. I had planned on going to the library so that I would be able to concentrate but my mom let my brother take the car to hang out with friends. Two days ago I went out with two old friends. They called me out of no where, To my surprise all one of my friend wanted was to ask me for a ride to TJ because she is or was going to run away today but I haven’t heard from her since I told her no. The little time I was with them they just kept talking about oh remember when we did this or that and I don’t really have any good memories of high school like that. Sometimes I feel like just running away myself but I don’t see how that would be possible for me. I have no where else to go and I don’t want to leave my school because I like school and I know that that is the only real way out but sometimes I just feel like running and just **** it. Not care where I would go or what I would do for food or housing just leaving.
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:( I'm so sorry to hear that. I think the best thing you need to do is to take time to prioritize your life. I dont know if by school you mean highschool or university/college but finish your highschool if you havent. After that, if home is that bad for you, move out once you are done. You dont deserve that kind of stress especially at a place where you call home. Dont run away or do anything to that extent b/c that wont help you in the long run. Finish your school, get a job and move out b/c you can always do secondary school part time. As for the friends, honestly, I dont talk to any of my "bestfriends" from highschool and all my good times were from university. I hope this helps you somewhat :) cheer up
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Thank you for that advice. Oh and for the school part. I am in college.
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Well your already on your way then :) Just prioritize. You will see that, when you look at whats really important to you in the long run, those things that you think matter now, really dont matter so much. In time you will get your degree, get a job, be out on your own :) People often look outside for happiness when it should come from within.
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Yeah, don't get caught up in highschool. You have the rest of yourlife to live! You need to find your passion. What keeps you going? What do you enjoy in life. You won't find happiness in work. Take a day off and plan on doing something that you like. Go hiking, go to a restuarant... go dancing. Just try something new... you need an adventure.
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Are you sure your mother is chooes your brother over you? Sometime it may seem that way but really is not. You may wanted the car to drive to the library but your brother beat you to it. If you ask your mother first she would have given you the car. I not trying to take side here but why you was not willing to help out someone else that was having problems? If the girl was running away she needed help. You see the next time you in trouble they came help you out. It doesn't away happen that way but the old saying in order to have friend you have to be a friend. Read a book; take up a hobby like stamp collecting, coins, something like that. Go on eBay to fine the best deals. It fun to go there a bid on the auctions; try to beat the others out on different items. Maybe video games you might like that, get an xbox 360 or playstation 3 game console. Those costs allot but lower cost systems are the playstation 2, xbox, gamecube. The hours fly by when playing the games. I do most of everything that I said here, if you do some of these things you will not be bored. Chess is another good past time. Get involve in church. You can to listen to Les Brown a motivational speaker at: http://www.lesbrown.com/million_dollar_roundup.html He's good and has some free links to listen to.