i’m 30 yrs.
he’s been separated for 3 yrs, but says he will never get a divorce because his legal rights will be affected. he is a lawyer (as am i). my issue - he still does whatever his ex-wife wants. he is at her beck and call.
he says it is because of their 8 yr old son together and if he does whatever she wants, he will keep getting access. as is, he sees his son at least 4 days a week. his ‘ex’ likes to go to dance clubs even though she is 40 yrs, she is a **** and she doesn’t mind him baby sitting. he pays $4k in child support- just because she threatens him if he doesn’t. i don’t understand what is his problemis, why he won’t go to the courts to figure out how much to pay, what access will be. she has been through 2 boyfriends since they broke up, and has even gotten him to pay the down payment on her new house (she promised him that they’d get back together, he paid the money, they moved back in for two weeks, then they broke up when she got a new boyfriend). we just got into an argument because tonight when he went to drop of his son, some people came to argue with his ex about money she owed them and he got involved - the police were even called. now he’s acting as her lawyer. and i’m pissed. the whole thing had nothing to do with him but he insists on being involved “Because he wants to” he says. he won’t talk to me about it. she is a vietnamese c**** ho who i believe has connections to the triad (she has a chop shop and gives him criminal clientsbecause the bunch of them run marijuana grow ops). i don’t know what to do i’m so utterly pissed at him and don’t know why i’m still seeing him.
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$4 k/month - and even though he brings in 6 figs/year, he is totally in the red because of her and says he will never be a rich man because he will never fight her in court. coward. or p******-whipped. ****** rice queen.
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Also, if he doesnt get a divorce then he doesnt have to make a comittment to you. He doesnt sound like a very good lawyer if he cant even figure out a decent access/child support arrangement for himself.
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Blame him all you want. You chose to date him... you choose to stay with him. When you are pointing your finger at him, just remember 3 fingers are pointing back at you. I understand that men can get a pretty raw deal in divorce, but as a lawyer he must know someone that is a decent divorce attorney. He's being run by fear. Personally, I couldn't live with someone that made all their choices out of fear.
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i actually am dating a man has an exwife... it was exactly as you explain.. he was jumping eveytime she asked or told him too... because of his daughter.. i tried to be nice to the woman.. because of the child... as i adore her.. however.. it got to the point in which i just could not handle it anymore.. i was getting depressed and crying to myself about the pain that i was feeling.. all of a sudden she started telling me how upset she was one day because it was "their anniversary".. know what.. i gave it to her.. i told her she was a sick *****... and that i was tired of it... as she was always throwing little jabs into me.. even when i was trying to be nice.. i talked to my boyfriend about it.. and he told me not to worry.. he doesnt want her back.. however he kept jumping for her.. finally i gave him an altumadum... me or her... he couldnt have both... and i was serious about leaving.. im not one to be a second... he chose me... and has not jumped for her since... so i suggest.. give him an altumadum.. if he wont stop.. then obviously he has no respect for you... and you should find someone new...