it starts off by how we met, and then how we broke up. none of you are going to really understand the part about me being 16, to make it easier,im 17 by the way, and the part about me getting caught before the weekend is how i was caught with something n cant go out, her nickname from me is “Erin” and i call her my hatian hoe(shes white, but i say shes black, haha) her name is at the bottom, but anyways, here it is. it was either late june or early july,
we played strip soccer and i was really high,
after a couple times, we got reall close,
started goin out, but still didnt rock the boat,
i was real stupid and said the wrong thing,
now your dad hates me, but at least i knew i was only 16,
we couldnt be together, no longer at your side,
thats the first and only time ive ever seen you cry,
seein you like that, hurt me real bad inside,
we godda hide and sometimes lie,
but its alright, cuz its worth all the effort and time,
i got caught right before the weekend,
i feel so bad that this had to happen,
i dont know how long this wait wil be,
the sooner is better, its so easy to see,
im lost without you, you fufilld my dream,
you took my heart, we make a great team,
im like a king, so ill call you my queen,
your my hatian hoe, and i hope you know,
that i love you and that it shows,
i cant stop thinking about you,
P******** M**** “Erin” Marko!
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it was pretty good but the ending was the worst part. but other than that it was really really good.
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i kno tha endin needs work, thx
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fashizell my nizzle
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actually its just cheesy , i mean the last part hehe but its nice :) its nice of you to do that ..
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Strip soccer ........how in tha hell do u play that
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HEY HEY DON'T BE MEAN TO THE PERSON. I THINK THAT IT IS GANGSTA AND POPIN
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I THINK THE POEM IS FRESH HOT. IT IS POP'N
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its hard 2 explain how to play it, haha. ill fix tha ending for u
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i kno that a lil better? i kno tha beat dont go together tho it was either late june or early july, we played strip soccer and i was really high, after a couple times, we got reall close, started goin out, but still didnt rock the boat, i was real stupid and said the wrong thing, now your dad hates me, but at least i knew i was only 16, we couldnt be together, no longer at your side, thats the first and only time ive ever seen you cry, seein you like that, hurt me real bad inside, we godda hide and sometimes lie, but its alright, cuz its worth all the effort and time, i got caught right before the weekend, i feel so bad that this had to happen, i dont know how long this wait wil be, the sooner the better, cuz im lost without you, you fufilld my dream, your all i really want and all that i need, im like a king, so ill call you my queen, your my hatian hoe, and i hope you know, that i love you and i hope it does shows, i cant stop thinking about you, P******** M**** “Erin” Marko!
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is this a lil better? - thats what i meant
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somethin like that, haha, but thx people
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IT KINDA COME TO A SUDDEN STOP. LIKE YOUR NOT FINISHED WITH WHAT YOUR TRYING TO SAY.
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check out my other poem/rap i just made in the other post while i fix it 4 u edhelpe
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i f**ked up the ending, but ill fix it later people it was either late june or early july, we played strip soccer and i was really high, after a couple times, we got real close, started goin out, but still didnt rock the boat, i was real stupid and said the wrong thing, now your dad hates me, but at least i knew i was only 16, we couldnt be together, no longer at your side, thats the first and only time ive ever seen you cry, seein you like that, hurt me real bad inside, we godda hide and sometimes lie, but its alright, cuz its worth all the effort and the time, i got caught right before the weekend, i feel so bad that this had to happen, i dont know how long this wait wil be, the sooner the better, im lost without you, cuz you fufilld my dream, your all i really want and all that i need, im like a king, so ill call you my queen, your my hatian hoe, and i hope you know that i love you, i cant stop thinking about ya, i want you in my arms, i see you when i look up at the stars, with you in my future, it would be the best, wish it'd be forever, i hope i pass the test, i hope that it shows, P******** M**** “Erin” Marko!
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It was pretty cool I thought that it was very origional
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dont try to steal it people
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wow. im speechless. AS a chick no offense but that stuff comes off corny to me. i dont know. people are so fake poetry is something you just dnt wanna be messing around with unless you really know what your doing. (then again i dont know the chick corny love lines might be her thing) lmao no it's the thought that counts and you make it sound sincere. So what if its raw? Some people like that. Besides it takes some serious balls to give poetry to a girl and i gotta give you props. Your girlfriends pretty lucky to have a guy sincere enough for that shyt. :) keep writing. (PS A WORD TO THE WISE... change the fkn ending what the hell is that? sounds like some stupid band lyrics. If you want help let me know. I happen to rock poetry,and you might want a girls advice no offense.)
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if u want to, u cant help with tha endin
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yo, help me with this julia!!!!!!!!! it needs alotta work, haha
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kk hmmmm... give me a sec on this one.
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wait is this a poem or meant to be a rap?
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it doesnt matter, however u want it to go, but i godda go, i should be on here tonight, but if im not, u can write a fixed version in here
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if u need me to explain why i wrote certain parts, just ask me n ill let ya kno. peace
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I just finished it. Check out your shoutouts... Use it well.